Monthly Archives: November 2013

Children lost….a Thanksgiving thought…

Yeah so, first thing is, I’m a bad, bad writer and blogger. Imagine, I’m so busy writing I forget to blog and time runs away from me so I hope you can all accept my heartfelt apology.

Second thing? I’m not American. I’m one of those crazy Canuks who celebrated our version of Thanksgiving around my birthday in October. We love our little holiday but America has turned Thanksgiving into an art! I will have my half-frozen ass parked in front of my television tomorrow morning watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade like I have for the past 30 years or so. It ranks right up there with watching Pops goes the Fourth in July, another holiday you guys do amazingly well.

But here’s what I’m thinking about today. I’m thinking about kids and how many of them are celebrating the holiday tomorrow…and every holiday…without their family. Not because they ran away or because some horrible tragedy has befallen the family, but because their family has thrown them away.

I look at my daughter and I can’t imagine anything that she might do that would cause me to throw her out of my house and choose to never see her again. I can’t ever fathom saying “you don’t live up to the ideals I have for you in my head and in my heart so you are no longer my child.” I’m pretty sure she could commit murder and I’d be the first one at her side, figuring out the best way to help her.

But the thing that absolutely leaves me stunned with anger and grief are parents who abandon their children because of who they love. How can love ever be something bad? I have a lot of friends who are a part of the LGBT community and I know some are going to be somewhere other than home tomorrow because they aren’t welcome in their familie’s homes and it makes me wish I could bring them into my family and give them the acceptance and love they deserve to be basking in.

And it’s not just them who a left alone.

There are parents who don’t approve of their child’s job, who don’t like some aspect of their children’s lifestyle so much that they just give them the ultimatum…be who I want you to be or get out. The ones who give in end up almost more alone and miserable than they were before because they are forced to give up some basic part of themselves to made everyone around them happy.

And the ones who don’t? They are my hero’s! They gather their strength and realize that they can’t make anyone truly happy if the aren’t be true to themselves first. And maybe it’s not their job to make the people around them happy anyway.

As a parent, I didn’t give birth to my daughter so that she could live out all my dreams that I couldn’t make come true. I didn’t want a child so that I would have someone to take care of me when I’m old and can’t do it for myself. When she was born I didn’t put conditions or labels on her and decide to love her only if she lived up to them. The day she came into my world I was already in love with her and my only ambition was to raise her to the best of my ability and hope that after I gave her the best childhood I could, that she would make the choices she needed to make herself happy.

Children don’t choose to be born. Regardless of how you got pregnant and any circumstances around it, once you made that choice to have that child then you are responsible for giving them everything they NEED in life to make it the best you can.

Now that doesn’t mean Playstations and i-phones. This means love and acceptance for who they are, not who you want them to be.

I have other friends who are estranged from their families for other reasons and they know who they are and I hope that you have friends to spend the day with (and maybe family that you choose instead of that you were born with). I hope everyone who’s celebrating tomorrow has a wonderful day and please, if you’re traveling, be careful on the crazy roads.

To those who are going to be alone…I wish I could gather you in my arms like you are in my heart and give you all the love and hugs your deserve. And to those families who have thrown their children away, I hope you come to your senses one day and realize that there’s a very limited amount of time to make amends with those children before it’s too late and someone is left with more regrets than they can handle. There are too many parent’s out there who would give anything to have the chance to spend one more holiday with their child.

I was going to rec a story about children who have been thrown out but realized I’ve already recced them all. So instead, I’m going to rec a story about courage and two young men who have to be braver than they’ve every been to be together.

“A Face in the Window” by Cheryl Headford is a fantastic story about two young men who’ve work hard to overcome their past on their way to their future. It will make you cry but you will smile in the end. Find it here at Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Face-Window-Cheryl-Headford-ebook/dp/B00GKR1OF2/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1385588725&sr=1-1&keywords=a+face+in+the+window

And as always you can find me here: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr_dp_sr_1?_encoding=UTF8&field-author=Cindy%20Sutherland&search-alias=digital-text&sort=relevancerank And here: http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/index.php?cPath=55_454

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under Hump Day, This is important.

Life is full of disappointment…well no shit…

Sigh, got my very first rejection and while I’m not exactly happy about it, I figured it was coming. I submitted a story to my publisher for their Valentine Anthology but as they were only taking 7 stories, I wasn’t holding out much hope. I am extremely happy that my friend Ashavan Doyon will have his story included however, so please think about picking it up and checking it out when it arrives in February. I know I will.

Then I had to decide what to do with the story because I really like it. It’s called Breaking Cupid’s Curse (I’m terrible at coming up with titles) and after some debate, I submitted it to another publisher for their love day collection. I don’t know if I will have any more luck with them but at least I tried. And if they don’t take it, I will post it as a free story here or something.

I’m also happy that my shifter-fic is coming along nicely. It’s not flowing as quickly as I’d like but I’m putting it down to feeling a lot of pressure because I want it to be the best thing I’ve ever written. Most of that pressure is coming from me and sometimes that’s the worst kind of all.

I’ve found myself wanting to write little fandom one-shots lately. This happens when I’m struggling with something big I’m working on. It gives my brain a little break and stops me from focusing so hard on something that is driving me slowly out of my mind.

I’m seriously considering trying to save for GRL next year. That’s the GayRomLit retreat specifically for writers in the LGBT genre. There are workshops and fundraisers and it seems like a great time is had by all. It’s a great way for writers to meet one another and there is also functions for readers and fans to come and hang out with their favorite authors. It’s in Chicago next year and I would love the chance to go. The chance to learn from writers I admire would be a once-in-a-lifetime thing.

My health kick came to a screaming halt for the last few weeks because I managed to catch the horrible cold that’s been going around and for the first time in years, it decided to kick my asthma into high gear. It’s very difficult to get any kind of exercise when crossing the room causes you to almost hack up a lung. After being stubborn for the better part of a week, I finally had no choice but to go the hospital around 4am last Friday. It’s really quiet in my small town hospital at that of day, by the way.

20 minutes later, I had a shiny new inhaler and an oxygen high and I was on my way home. It’s funny how I didn’t realize how much I couldn’t breathe until I finally could.

And now of course, we have snow…and ice. I hate ice. Fortunately, a very generous family member (thanks Joanne) has offered me a treadmill so I will be able to get back on my exercise kick. Plus, one of my day home kids has a mom who’s a fitness trainer and has offered to show me some resistance exercises that I can do at home so I think I will take her up on that when she gets back from their vacation next week.

Oh, and to add to my stress, I’ve spent all week waiting for my dad to go up for knee surgery. He’s been in the hospital since Monday when he went to see a specialist and they decided to keep him. He finally went up this morning and trust me when I say it’s a good thing for everyone involved.

So, now I have a fic rec.

Dex in Blue by Amy Lane is the story of young men who work in the porn industry. It’s book 2 in her Johnnies series but it stands alone quite well.

David used to have a different future until fate came along and changed everything. Now he’s Dex, a top porn model and making a different, lonely life far from where…and who he used to be.

Then along comes his co-worker who needs a place to stay and David decides to help him out…and changes his whole life once again.

I like this story because of what it doesn’t do. It doesn’t vilify or put down people who work in porn. It shows them as human…real people who are mostly doing the best they can to get through life. It talks about second chances and forgiving yourself and it takes you on a hell of a ride along the way.

Give Dex and Kane a chance and they will make you smile.

Get it here: http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=3250 and here: http://www.amazon.com/Dex-Blue-Johnnies-Amy-Lane-ebook/dp/B009KB4YIY/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1383923870&sr=1-1&keywords=dex+in+blue

And hey, while you’re at it, check out my stuff: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr_dp_sr_1?_encoding=UTF8&field-author=Cindy%20Sutherland&search-alias=digital-text&sort=relevancerank

and here too: http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/index.php?cPath=55_454

1 Comment

Filed under Friday Ramblings